#Forum-It: Issue 24

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comments.deviantart.com/18/166… [suggested by SARDONlCUS]

Janezy-and-her-Tea: Villagers in Devon often sacrifice first-born daughters to Ulyoth -the ancient of planes and dimensions- in the hopes that they get their previously sacrificed first-born son -which they sacrificed to God- back.

Janezy-and-her-Tea: Cats lick their bums to get rid of the taste of cat food from their mouths.

Janezy-and-her-Tea: In the event of mediocre complaint threads Janezy-The-Insanezy takes it upon herself to make several random comments because of reasons.

Janezy-and-her-Tea: She then replies to her own comments with more comments containing not-quite-entirely-true trivia.

Janezy-and-her-Tea: A spiral staircase is actually helix shaped because a spiral has to get larger with each consecutive coil.

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comments.deviantart.com/18/166… [suggested by ChaostheKitty]

Pharaoh-Ink: Yeah well sandwiches are sexist inventions too since only women are allowed to make them, which means I have to keep one around!

But...you make me make the sandwiches for you.

Your point?

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comments.deviantart.com/18/166… [suggested by Stieger]

Allura-Darkelf: I think I can top that. My 15 year old cousin proceeded to tell me of her Spanish teacher and how she was "targeting her." I then ask her who it was because she was going to the same high school I went to. She said she didn't remember her name.
"Did she have an accent? Mine was from Chile, so she had a Spanish accent."
"I don't know. She's from Chile or somewhere like that in New Mexico."
"Chile is in South America. You need to work on your Geography."
"I'm not good at math."

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comments.deviantart.com/18/165… [suggested by B-gata]

Rayum: Oh no, suspended for a few weeks? Whatever shall we do.

Queen-of-Disturbia: Doesn't stop me from being sad.

Rayum: Maybe man up a little.

Totally-dead: Females do not man up. They Woman up.

Rayum: That's illogical. Stop being such a woman.

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forum.deviantart.com/devart/ge… [suggested by CrimzonLogic]

ftpaddict: What's the first body part you take care of, come washie washie time?
If your answer includes privates, feel free to think of a creative name for it.

Shiraha-Kun: I just end up standing there for like 10 minutes before I actually start anything. But I start with my Yahoo! and go to my Google. Then I work my way up to my facebook. I then tweet about it.

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comments.deviantart.com/18/166… [suggested by ghostpyjamas]

(On weeaboos)

QuillandPaper: Because it's allowed in the anime, don't you see! If it's anime it must be socially acceptable.

sbkMulletMan: Oh good, let me find a mutant octopus to molest your blurry crotch!

QuillandPaper: Molest your own blurry crotch. I'm playing the innocent virgin in this anime.

sbkMulletMan: Don't you take that poorly-dubbed tone with me, woman! I'll feel your tit and my nose will bleed all over you!

QuillandPaper: Only if I get to scream "pervert" and hit you with an oversized mallet (which I shouldn't be able to pick up, let alone swing) that I pulled out of my hammer-space.

sbkMulletMan: Okay, just as long as you give the obnoxiously cute animal time to make stupid expressions of wonder as it gazes vacantly in our direction. We have to make this bullshit marketable, you know.

QuillandPaper: Of course! I'll be sure to hold it next to my giant cleavage and and scream loudly when convenient winds come by and blow up my obscenely short skirt.

sbkMulletMan: Take your time, we have 18 episodes dedicated to showing this one, meaningless concept.

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comments.deviantart.com/18/164… [suggested by lesser-pandas]

(On breastfeeding in public)

TheEELeater: We should all just whip out our breasts in public, for no reason whatsoever.
I'm serious.

MorbidiaDrekk: Better yet, we should all get together in one place and do it and then complain about the people who aren't doing it.

TheEELeater: Yes.
We should also attack them physically and pull their shirts up.

MorbidiaDrekk: And then give them purple nurples!

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comments.deviantart.com/18/165… [suggested by RockLou]

(On things that you do that you think that nobody else does.)

3wyl: Talk to myself. Not that that is valid, as such.

haphephilia: I am you.

3wyl: I always thought I was you, though.

haphephilia: We're together now, connected. United as one.

3wyl: Do you think we'll be able to get a clone?

haphephilia: Oh but we will, we must!

3wyl: I say you give a bigger portion of yourself.

haphephilia: Like my butt?

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comments.deviantart.com/18/166… [suggested by TokenRabbit]

TokenRabbit: A molecular cloud collapsed in on itself, then heaps of space junk began to orbit around said collapsed cloud. Over time, said space junk continuously collided until they had formed a bunch of round balls. Then chunks of ice flew through space and bombarded said round balls.

Now that I think about it, that last bit sounds an awful lot like an impregnation metaphor.

Zalcoti: Space made our planet pregnant with life!

TokenRabbit: Bend over.



SchnitzelMobile: This

TokenRabbit: And thus life happened, in a fiery climax of molten rock and space juice.

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comments.deviantart.com/18/166… [suggested by SARDONlCUS]

InternetSatan: If you had given me your soul, the job would have been yours. Though I already have all of the Complaint regulars souls, so I suppose it's a futile quest, regardless. Have you considered selling yourself to men for sex?

InternetJesus: You're that desperate for sex, aren't you?

InternetSatan: I don't have to pay for sex, they practically throw themselves at me, with the whole don't throw me into a burning pit of torment pickup line. Hell, I remember this one time I met this chick, and she'd do anything. One of the sluttiest women I ever met. After she got knocked up she told the guy she was engaged to that she was still a virgin, and that an angel came down told her a prophecy, and he actually believed her. What a dumbass.

InternetJesus: Hey, man, just one question. Does your butt still hurt after they tossed you on your ass out of heaven?

InternetSatan: At least I don't have my nose constantly shoved up Gods ass. I'm surprised it isn't permanently stained brown by now.

InternetJesus: Your just jealous I don't have anything of mine sticking up your ass.

InternetSatan: You're just mad that your penis is too tiny to even be worth sticking up my ass.

InternetJesus: You're the one who tried to tempt me after I had fasted for forty days in the desert and I still rejected you.

Big or small, you know you want me.

InternetSatan: I'm actually rather glad you did reject me in the desert. After that whole yelling at a fig tree for not bearing fruit off-season thing, I’ve thought you were a loony, maybe even a schizophrenic. I don’t think I want to sleep with a crazy person.

InternetJesus: At least I'm not some half-goat freak show!

InternetSatan: At least I was never nailed to a cross and left to die.

InternetJesus: That was low, man, even for you.

InternetSatan: Well I really don't like it when people tease my appereance. I'm shallow like that.


Do you really think they make me look like a freak show? :c

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